Doesn’t it sound intelligent when you can use medical words? Of course , you sound even more intelligent if you actually know what those words mean. Last Friday I had my second colonoscopy. ( One of the many privileges of getting older ). The procedure itself takes only about 10 minutes, yet you may spend between 3 and 4 hours in the hospital. They also request that you have a responsible adult drive you home ( this of course excluded any Greek people that I knew, so a non-Greek friend drove me home).

I was thrilled this time because they didn’t knock me out ( I was able to hear everything – pretty cool ). Of course I didn’t understand half of what was being said. I attribute this to the drugs and not my lack of knowledge. In the recovery room, the doctor came in to tell me about the number of polyps removed and where they were located. He also proceeded to give me advice on my eating habits. I was a bit reluctant to take nutritional advice from someone who makes a living probing people’s butts. Apparently I am to reduce the number of cokes that I drink ( at least he was smart enough not to use the word eliminate ).

Not only did the doctor tell me what had been done, he gave me colored pictures to take home. Most people have pictures of their children and pets to show, I have pictures of the insides of my colon and intestine. I was hungry the day of my procedure since they only allow a liquid diet the day before. Seeing those pictures seemed to cure my hunger.